


Lean On Me

by bad_ash10, edgeoflights



Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV)
Genre: BAMF Melinda May, Episode Tag, Fluff and Angst, Kid Skye | Daisy Johnson, Multi, Parent Melinda May, Season/Series 07, Skye | Daisy Johnson Feels, Skye | Daisy Johnson Needs a Hug, Skye | Daisy Johnson's Superpowers, mama may
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-26
Updated: 2020-07-28
Packaged: 2021-03-06 07:26:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 7,633
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25519504
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bad_ash10/pseuds/bad_ash10, https://archiveofourown.org/users/edgeoflights/pseuds/edgeoflights
Summary: AU: In Season 7 episode 8, we see May and Yoyo go to Afterlife because Yoyo's powers don't work. What if Daisy's quakes didn't work instead, and she was the one who went with May to seek Jiaying's help?Daisy had always been self-reliant, keeping her emotions closed behind her walls. Now, after years of trauma and loss, her powers seem to be missing, or at least malfunctioning, after Malick’s torturous treatment. She goes with May to Afterlife for help, resulting in some MayDaisy feels and maybe a confession of their true relationship: A mother and daughter that need each other more than they'll admit.This story is part of theLLF Comment Project.
Relationships: Jiaying & Melinda May, Jiaying & Skye | Daisy Johnson, Lincoln Campbell/Skye | Daisy Johnson, Melinda May & Skye | Daisy Johnson, Minor or Background Relationship(s), Phil Coulson & Skye | Daisy Johnson, Phil Coulson/Melinda May, Relationships not tagged in any order, Skye | Daisy Johnson & Antoine Triplett, Skye | Daisy Johnson/Daniel Sousa, mentioned:
Comments: 38
Kudos: 243





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Three chapters; Chapter 1 is arriving at Afterlife, Chapter 2 is sparring and cathartic memory/emotional healing, and Chapter 3 is Daisy and May finally having that talk we've missed so much in canon. (Edit: It's four chapters as of 7/26)
> 
> Co-written by Ashley and Ellie :D
> 
> Enjoy!! <3

Jemma said that Daisy’s fluids were all back up to a healthy amount, her blood loss had been accounted for, and that her cuts were now simply superficial.

Basically, Jemma meant she was healed. Daisy had been unconscious in the chamber for forty-eight hours, and whatever futuristic tech in there that had been used to heal May had also lessened her wounds. By all accounts and purposes, she had made a full, miraculous recovery from Nathaniel Malick’s experiments.

She didn’t feel that way.

Daisy couldn’t exactly put it into words, but something was off. In addition from the throbbing pain coming from the cuts and bruises on her collarbone, spine, and arms, her body seemed to have a dull ache that didn’t have any origin. It was everywhere, pooling mostly in her gut, not lessened by lack of movement or stretching or breathing or painkillers. It was just… there, nagging at her constantly. She’d discussed it with Simmons, who’d had no idea about what it could be, though seemed to hint that it may be emotional. Daisy had ignored her.

May had taught her to mine what she was feeling, to use it for motivation. Daisy had always used her hurt and anger and frustration to propel her forward. She was good at that, for the most part, though when she’d ordered Deke to kill Malick, she hadn’t admitted it to the team but all she could think of was Lincoln; and preventing his death. It had been a moment of misjudgement on her part, and she couldn’t do it again. She couldn’t let her emotions bleed into the mission.

So she told herself it couldn’t be emotional. Daisy was strong, and she had to protect the team. She couldn’t do that if she was hung by her traumas. She needed to move on. 

So she tried to ignore it.

She walked down to mission control for the first time since waking up next to a forcefully-cheerful Simmons and a dozing Sousa. Daisy could hear the team talking before she got there, and by the sound of it, something was wrong with the jump drive.“What’s wrong, guys?” she asked as she finally made her way into the control room.

May looked to her with worry in her eyes, which was jarring, but before she could think about it any further Sousa spoke. “Daisy, you should be resting,” he said, mirroring the concern in all of the team’s eyes, which she hated. They needed to focus on their mission, not her. She couldn’t hold them back.

Daisy shook her head stubbornly. “I’m fine,” she lied unconvincingly. “Something’s wrong with the jump drive? How do we fix it?” she asked the only person who knew anything about the new upgrades to the Zephyr.

Jemma sighed and pursed her lips. “We are trying to figure out how to stop the jump drive from sending us into oblivion. We could stop it by disconnecting the fuel cell regulator and prevent us from jumping in the time stream anymore, but here’s the problem: the field surrounding it is cycling at a rate of 49 pulses per second, and obliterating anything it touches. The only way I can think of to reach the regulator and remove it is for Daisy to use her powers to disrupt the energy field. If she quakes it, she can suspend its animation for a few seconds, giving us just enough time for another agent to retrieve the regulator. But…”

“My powers don’t work.” Daisy finished for her with a sigh. Again, she was failing them. First by letting Nathaniel obtain her powers, and now again she was letting them down again. She was supposed to be strong for the team, and now the most important and useful part of her was gone.”

“Simmons, do you have any theories about Daisy’s lack of powers?” May asked.

Poor Simmons. Lately, they were all looking to her for answers that she just didn’t seem to have. “I wish I did, but I just don’t know enough about Inhuman biology to…” the rest of what she was saying was tuned out by Daisy.

_ Inhuman biology _ … Daisy suddenly realized the solution to solving her loss of power and subsequently fixing the time drive and saving the Zephyr. “My mom does,” she interrupted Jemma’s helpless explanation, to everyone’s surprise. She even noticed a tired eye roll from May at the mention of Jiaying. “It’s 1983, right? Jiaying is at Afterlife. If anyone knows how to cure Inhuman powers, it’s her.”

“Can they get there in time?” Yoyo asked Jemma doubtfully.

Simmons hurried over to look at the monitors displaying the countdown and the destination of their next jump. “You could make it,” she said excitedly, looking to Daisy. “If you leave before the next jump.”

Mack spoke up in agreement - he seemed to be going along with her plan, as insane as it sounded. “May, you’ve been to Afterlife before. Prep the quinjet, but do not leave before I give the order.” 

From her peripherals, Daisy could see May making a face that meant she obviously disagreed, but the older agent didn’t argue. “Well I need coordinates and a countdown here,” she said, handing her watch over to Simmons. “I’m not doing… time math.”

\--

Once Mack had given the order, it had only taken May a few seconds to launch the quinjet. They peeled off smoothly, setting their course for Afterlife. After flying only a few minutes, though, Daisy was up and moving. 

She couldn’t sit still - knowing she was going to see her mother again was anxiety inducing. And that was putting it mildly. The last time she had seen Jiaying, she had almost been murdered as her mother tried to drain her of her life force.

A voice from the cockpit broke through her thoughts. “ _ Sit down. _ I can feel you worrying from here,” May said with a hint of irritability.

This news took Daisy aback. “You can? I thought you had to touch someone to do that?” She sat heavily in the co-pilot’s seat once more, hoping May would explain. When she offered no reply, Daisy pressed again, “When did this start?”

“While Yoyo and I were in the Lighthouse,” May began. “I was starting to feel more like myself. And then um… I picked up on Mack and Yoyo’s...” May cleared her throat. “Uh, reunion… from outside the room.”

“Shit,” Daisy said, bemused. “May, that’s  _ horrible.”  _

May gave her a sly grin, one Daisy hadn’t seen since before the temple. Even though she knew May was just feeding off of her own reaction, it was nice to see something other than the cold impassiveness that had chiseled her face as of late. “Speaking of romance, what exactly is going on between you and Sousa? I’ve been picking up on something new between you two today.”

Daisy knew May had always been discerning enough to pick up on  _ whatever _ was starting to form with her and Sousa, but the difference was, now that May was an empath, she obviously didn’t mind asking about it.

“Well?” May questioned.

Realizing May was using this as diversion, Daisy pivoted the conversation. “I know you’re asking to distract me, but do you really want to know?”

The edges of May’s mouth turned upward just the tiniest bit and she raised her eyebrows as she waited for Daisy to continue.

She sighed heavily. At this point May probably knew as much about what she was feeling as Daisy herself did. It was too new and they had too many responsibilities to concern herself with any thought of romance. “We’ll see if we can save the world  _ again _ . And go from there.”

May nodded in understanding, seeming to let the matter drop. Though, Daisy had a feeling she hadn’t heard the last of May’s questions on the topic.

The distraction had worked temporarily, but the longer they sat in silence, the worse Daisy’s anxiety became once again. She was full of nervous energy and began tapping her foot, unable to sit still any longer.

Melinda sighed heavily, obviously picking up on Daisy’s mood once again. “You’re still worrying.”

“You feeling what I’m feeling is only going to stress the both of us out even more.” Daisy replied dejectedly. 

May flipped a switch on the control panel before continuing. “A negative emotion feedback loop. I’m well aware.”

Purposely keeping her tone light, Daisy said, “Could come in handy with my murderous mother.” She took some small comfort in knowing May’s newfound abilities would at least give them an advantage if things went south.

“Daisy,” May began reassuringly, “she hasn’t yet endured the trauma from Whitehall in this timeline. She isn’t the same person you knew.”

That was true, Daisy realized. Jiaying had only become a murderer after Hydra had cut her to pieces and left her for dead.

“Though, I’m not thrilled to see your mother either,” Melinda added flatly.

Daisy’s eyes widened in shock. She hadn’t thought about how this trip would impact May. 

“She started a war with Shield… Tried to kill you.” May paused, adjusting their course as they approached their destination. “Jiaying was dangerous and likely still is, but if she can help you, that’s all that matters right now.”

Realizing May was right, Daisy inhaled deeply, pushing her feelings deeper inside. She had to protect the team, and that meant she couldn’t let her emotions get in the way of getting her powers back.

\--

Daisy was pacing.

She and May were alone together in one of the blood-red rooms she recognized as a holding room for new inhumans at Afterlife, and she couldn’t stop moving. The underlying discomfort was still there, sitting heavily in her gut, but was now accompanied by a buzzing of frantic energy that she couldn’t shake off either.

“Stop that. You don’t want her to see you nervous,” May said, scanning the room for escape points if needed. Daisy stopped, squinted at her, then struggled to keep her legs still while she fiddled with her fingers. 

“ ‘M not nervous,” she repeated with a mumble, feeling unbearably childish and weak; unable to keep her cool for something so important to the mission.

Before May could respond with a knowing rebuttal, the heavy bronze double doors at the front of the rectangular room opened to reveal Jiaying and a disgruntled, younger man beside her. Jiaying’s impassive face uncomfortably reminded Daisy of May. She let out a silent gasp of air at seeing her mother’s smooth, beautiful face; unmarred by what Whitehall would do in the future.

“You were calling my name when you arrived. How do you know it?” Jiaying asked, quietly but firmly, with a wary look in her eyes that Daisy realized wasn’t nearly as distrustful as it’d been after Whitehall. It was sad how, without Whitehall, her mom might have been able to raise her here, in this beautiful place that didn’t exist anymore in 2020.

After a short pause, Daisy realized May wasn’t going to be doing the talking when her old mentor nudged her. “Oh. Um, I’m an inhuman,” she answered awkwardly. “I need your help.”

Though Daisy hadn’t technically answered her question, Jiaying tilted her head a little and addressed her daughter as if she were a stranger. And technically, in this timeline, she was. “You’re an inhuman? How?”

“You’re not the only one with terrigen crystals,” Daisy answered, biting her lip as Jiaying sighed. Her mother opened her mouth to respond but the man next to her interjected, venom in his voice. “If you’re inhuman, show us,” he sneered.

Daisy bit back a retort about his attitude. “That’s the problem. My powers aren’t working.”

“That’s convenient. Maybe after a few days here, you’ll stop lying,” he hissed, his half-baked threat evident. Daisy resisted the urge to roll her eyes.

During the exchange, May had been studying Jiaying closely. Before the man and Daisy could start threatening each other and possibly ruin any chances of Jiaying helping them, she spoke up, addressing Daisy’s mother. “ _ Nî xiāngxìn tā. Huòzhĕ zhìshāo nín xiăng yào _ .”

Daisy turned to May in surprise, recognizing that she’d spoken Mandarin but unable to understand. She didn’t remember anything from the few lessons May had given her back before Trip died, before Bobbi and Hunter left, before she became Quake… She felt a sharp twist in her heart at the memory of early morning’s between ‘Skye’ and her S.O., complete with tea and a sense of belonging.

She hadn’t felt that way in a while.

“ _ Nín yěshì wǒmen zhī yī ma _ ?” Jiaying responded, the language rolling off of her tongue smoothly. 

Daisy watched as May paused, thinking, then answered, “ _ Bù, wǒ de… nǚ'ér zài zhèlǐ. _ ”

Daisy could’ve sworn she heard the word ‘daughter’ in there, but brushed that hopeful thought away. She and May barely interacted anymore; whatever hopeful dreams she’d once had about their relationship were implausible now. May wasn’t… the same. She couldn’t hang her hopes on naive pursuits like that anymore. She didn’t need May anymore. She was strong alone. 

The man next to Jiaying gave an unhappy noise at whatever Melinda had said. Daisy internally elephant when she realized she was the only person in the room who had no idea what was being said.

“ _ Nà tā jiù xūyào zhèng míng _ . Li, if you would.” Jiaying nodded to the man, Li, who disappeared for a few moments. 

While he was gone, Daisy tugged May’s arm and they faced away from Jiaying. “Uh… what?”

“You’re going to prove you’re inhuman,” May translated. Daisy stared at her. “But I don’t have my-”

“This is a diviner,” Jiaying announced firmly. Daisy groaned internally and whirled back around to see Li smugly holding a dark box out to her. He unlocked the latch and opened it, revealing the unassuming metal device that had killed Daisy’s best friend and changed her life forever.

Suffice it to say she and the diviner weren’t on the best of terms.

“Humans die if they touch it. Inhumans…” Before Li could finish, Daisy picked up the obelisk, already predicting the orange glow it developed when it made contact with her DNA. Li inhaled sharply, and Jiaying’s mouth quirked up just a little and she nodded. “So it’s settled then. We’ll do what we can for you. What’s your name?”

Daisy bit her lip, then responded, “Skye.”

Jiaying nodded, then met May’s eyes one more time, and Daisy could feel a tension building there. She wasn’t sure of its origin, but there was some kind of unspoken battle happening between the two women. Before she could be sure that their silent exchange wasn’t just her imagination, Jiaying turned around and left the room followed by Li.

Daisy shot May a glance, but her mentor’s face was schooled into a blank sheet again. She sighed and followed after her not-yet-psychopathic(maybe) mother.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We lied, it'll be four chapters so that the word count is more even. Basically chapter 2 is split into two parts <3
> 
> (Note from Ellie: I wrote the Pinyin Mandarin in the last chapter, people were saying they couldn't translate it in google translate. Apologies! I used my past knowledge of Mandarin and crosschecked words I forgot with Google Translate and a dictionary, so it's not a phrase directly translatable with GT. If you were curious, it was exactly what May and Jiaying said in mandarin in canon, but instead of May referring to Daisy as a 'friend' it was changed to 'daughter', and Daisy picked up on that. Sorry for any confusion!)

Daisy scrunched her nose up uncomfortably as the familiar yet strange sensation of needles entering her skin crawled up her body. She was laying on a cot with a towel over both her sensitive areas and one under her neck. The needles weren’t even the uncomfortable part.

It was the fact that Li, May, and Jiaying standing in the room just looking at her that was causing her discomfort.

She sighed. “Do I get any privacy?” she asked, unable to help the slight whine that came out with her words. She was completely unable to move, paralyzed because of the healing effects of the needles.

“Don’t worry, they’ll be removed soon,” Jiaying responded lightly, walking around the cot, ending up behind Daisy’s head, out of sight. It made her uncomfortable. Why wasn’t May picking up on that? She’d had no trouble ‘empathing’ her stress in the quinjet earlier.

Daisy gritted her teeth, hating her compromising position. With the needles in her body and being unable to properly locate where anybody was in the room because all she could see was the ceiling and her powers were currently… not working. 

“Are we hurting you, Skye?”

“No. I’m just not sure how this is helping,” Daisy replied grouchily. “Last-” she stopped. She was going to say that last time she’d experienced this had been with Lincoln, and it had been to help her control her powers. She didn’t need to control them now, she wanted them back.

Jiaying didn’t seem to notice her cutting off herself. “It’s just one part of the puzzle. This will help break down any poison in your body.”

Oh. That’s what it had been doing all those years ago. Unnecessarily.

“How much longer will this take?” Daisy asked, semi-impatiently. She and May had a time limit, and the seconds were ticking.

“We’ll do what we can as fast as possible. Though it would help us to know exactly what this… event was.”

“I don’t-” Daisy didn’t know how to put ‘well, I got kidnapped and tortured by a disciple of the guy who will eventually do the same to you’ nicely. “It was traumatic, but it shouldn’t have taken away my powers like it did.”

“Can you describe it?”

Daisy answered, “Uh, yeah. So I was able to be in tune with the vibrations in the air and then manipulate them to create earthquakes. After the… trauma, I could still feel the vibrations of everything around me; it’s like a buzzing under my skin, but I couldn’t manipulate those vibrations. I have no control over them, I can just sense them. I lost a large part of my ability through that.”

“Ah.” Jiaying nods and turns, whispering something to another healer in the room.

Daisy spoke up awkwardly as the needles began to get removed and sensation returned to her body. “I know you didn’t have to help me, so. Thank you.”

“We look out for our community.” Jiaying answered simply.

“Our community does not involve two strangers,” Li hissed, hostility radiating off of him in waves.

May turned to Li and glared at him, “Don’t get too bent out of shape. Once we cure Da- Skye, we’ll forget we ever found this place.”

“I decide when you leave. Not you.” He snarled. Jiaying turned and shot them both a look, and to Daisy’s surprise, they both backed down.

“I think it’s time we try something different,” Jiaying offered.

\--

“What, are we trying to hold a seance?” May asked irritably as they settled in on the mat on the floor, careful not to bump any of the hundred or so lit candles surrounding them.

Daisy snorted. “Yeah. It is a little over the top.” It was likely supposed to be soothing or encourage a meditative state, but it just made the room feel sticky and warm.

They sat as Jiaying had instructed, cross-legged with their knees almost touching the other’s. “Could’ve at least given us a pillow,” May grumbled.

Jiaying either hadn’t heard May’s snide comments or, more likely, had chosen to ignore them. 

“What’s this?” Daisy questioned as Jiaying handed her a cup of something dark and murky. 

“It will help strengthen the between your subconscious and conscious mind,” Jiaying told her cryptically; it seemed that was the only explanation she would get.

As Daisy drained the cup, May asked, “Is that whiskey? And if so I want a lot of it.”

“No. Just herbs and some dirt,” Daisy spluttered, willing the concoction to stay down. She shut her eyes, trying to focus. “But at this point, I’ll try anything.” 

“Do I have to be this close to her face?” Melinda questioned unexpectedly. 

Daisy realized how much she had missed May’s snarky comebacks lately, and stole a glance at May, glad to see the woman she had been before the events in the temple reappearing a bit at a time.

Jiaying gave May a small, encouraging smile, as she had done many times when training Daisy to use her power. “From what you described, physical contact makes the connection stronger,” Jiaying reasoned.

May studied Jiaying for a brief moment, but rolled her eyes and grudgingly placed a hand on each of Daisy’s knees.

The contact was surprisingly jarring for Daisy as she realized the last time she and May had touched had been in the temple. She pushed the thought away quickly, focusing once again on Jiaying’s instructions and placing her own hands on May’s legs.

They both closed their eyes. 

“Now breathe in,” Jiaying coached. 

_Inhale._

This felt like the worst yoga class ever. 

_Exhale_.

Daisy wondered if May was just as frustrated as she was.

_Inhale._

Wait. Of course she was, if not by her own emotions, then certainly by reading Daisy’s. 

“I can see my presence is making you self conscious… I’ll let you work it out on your own.” Jiaying stood and made her way to the door, thankfully leaving the two of them in relative peace.

May sighed quietly, and they sat in silence for a moment as Daisy tried to focus; to unblock her mind.

“Believe it or not, May, all I’m feeling is worse,” Daisy mumbled. This was supposed to help, but so far it just felt like a bad facsimile of meditation.

“Yeah, all I’m getting from you is embarrassment. If physical contact will help, I have an idea,” May said, standing and holding out a hand to Daisy.

Daisy stared at May uncertainly for a moment. “Please tell me we’re not going to spoon,” she said lightly as she took May’s hand, trying to make a joke while secretly longing for nothing more than May to at least give her a hug. 

Daisy wondered if she had pushed her emotions aside fast enough to keep May from reading them. Thankfully, May just cracked a half smile and motioned with her chin to the middle of the room before pulling Daisy to her feet. 

Daisy cocked her head curiously as May pulled off her mission jacket, leaving herself in just a tank top. The pieces in Daisy’s mind refused to click even as May popped her neck and assumed a fighting stance. After a second of her blankly staring at the older woman, May rolled her eyes. “We’re going to spar,” she explained. “If we have to maintain physical contact comfortably, this is the way to do it.”

Daisy avoided mentioning that practically _any_ physical contact with her would be comfortable and welcome.

Realizing they were going to fight, Daisy shook her wrists and ankles and mirrored her old mentor’s stance.

“Ready?”

“Ready,” Daisy confirmed.

Before she could think any further, May threw a punch straight at her face which she quickly blocked before sidestepping a kick to her gut.

“You need to fight back. You can’t be on defense the entire time,” May growled as she flipped Daisy to the floor. She got up with a grunt and rolled behind May before landing a kick to her back.

“That’s more like it.” May grabbed Daisy’s leg and blocked two punches before twisting Daisy and toppling her to the ground. “I want you to try and beat me. Push back at me using your power.”

“I’m still not sure-” Before she got a chance to voice her doubts, three rapid punches were flying at her face, and she barely managed to block them before thrusting her hand out to quake May- yet nothing happened. She could feel the vibrations in her body and around her, they were _there_ , buzzing under her skin, but they weren’t working to manipulate the particles around her. 

_Fuck._ She groaned in frustration.

“I can’t-”

“Yes, you _can._ ” May landed a hit to Daisy’s side while she was disoriented, resulting in Daisy locking her arms behind her back and pushing her mentor to the floor, where she lay before getting back up, brushing her hair out of her face. Something about the split second where May had been on the floor, though…

Daisy’s vision went dark as she was thrown into one of her most painful memories.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> <3

_ Daisy spun on her heel, moving quickly to where May had collapsed in the sand. _

_ “May,” she whispered. “Hey, hey.” She pulled May into her lap gently. _

_ Somehow FitzSimmons had been wrong, May was still alive, but Daisy was now able to see the severity of the wounds covering May’s torso, and was surprised the older agent was still breathing. _

_ Then again, this was Melinda May. She would fight beyond the point most others would, but Daisy knew the end was fast approaching for May. Her breaths were fast and shallow, her skin rapidly losing the little color it had left.  _

_ “Daisy? Did you destroy it? That thing inside him?” May questioned tiredly. _

_ Tears were welling in Daisy’s eyes. Even now, at the moment of her death, May was asking about Coulson.  _

_ “We did,” she told May with a small, reassuring smile. _

_ Melinda looked relieved. “Was there… anything left? … Coulson?” she asked hopefully. _

_ A new wave of grief washed over Daisy, this time tinged with guilt and regret. It was partly her fault that Sarge had stabbed May. She should’ve fought harder to convince May this alien wasn’t Coulson - they shouldn’t have bought into his lies. _

_ Daisy shook her head sadly, not trusting herself to speak without her voice breaking. _

_ Melinda blinked rapidly, and Daisy could see the last of her determination to live draining from behind her eyes. _

_ “I was hoping to… see him again.” _

_ She nodded, the tears blurring her vision. “Me, too,” Daisy managed, forcing the words past the lump in her throat.  _

_ “I guess… I guess I’ll see him soon enough.” May’s eyelids fluttered. _

_ Daisy couldn’t lose May, too. She’d just lost her last hope of seeing Coulson, and now it was her own fault that May was dead, too. _

_ It was all her fault. _

She snapped back to the present, heaving as she steadied herself on an old dresser in the room. She looked up to see May in a similar position, struggling to breathe. After a few seconds, she was able to croak, “Did you see that too?”

When May nodded, Daisy decided that instead of thinking about the implications of what Melinda seeing her memories meant, she growled, “That dirt tea seemed to have worked too well,” and lunged towards her mentor. May sidestepped her swing, having already recovered from Daisy’s emotional collapse, and landed a hit to her shoulder before twisting it around to her back, immobilizing her. Daisy gritted her teeth and flipped May over her back where the senior agent landed upright like a cat.

Daisy thrust her hand out once again, attempting to quake Melinda, but after the now-familiar blockage of her vibrations, the familiar pose sent her spiraling into another memory, this one less painful and more shameful.

_ It wasn’t supposed to happen like this. _

_ Daisy had been chasing the latest Watchdogs that were running a weapons trade, and one had lagged behind. She caught up to him in a dark alley, grinning when his face turned to one of terror. She didn’t plan on doing too much, just roughing him up for some information on locations of the Watchdogs. _

_ He stuttered out some half-form of a plea for mercy, having known Daisy’s- no, ‘Quake’s’ reputation. She rolled her eyes and sent a quake at him, and he flew into the brick wall before falling sharply onto a pile of trash bags. _

_ She heard it before she saw it. _

_ It was sickening, like aluminum foil being crunched but with a hollow echo to it that sent a chill down Daisy’s spine. Keeping her hand up, she moved closer to the man, who was now slumped in an awkward position, unmoving. She prodded his body with his foot, and when he didn’t respond, she checked his pulse and fought back the wave of nausea that accompanied the hard, dead skin below her fingers. _

_ That day was one of the hardest. She fought back a panic attack as she dragged his body behind the dumpster, careful not to leave evidence on him, though the police would surely figure out from the crashing of all of the bones in his body that ‘Quake’ had done this. _

_ Because she had. She had killed a man. Not an innocent one, and yet not one that deserved to die.  _

_ Her old team had said she wasn’t a killer; she was under Hive’s sway. That none of it was her fault. _

_ Well, this was. _

_ She was a murderer. _

Daisy gasped coming out of the memory, meeting May’s eyes, expecting to see horror, but there was just understanding. May was feeling and remembering everything she was, so why hadn’t she pushed her away yet? Why didn’t May realize what Daisy had done?

“I wouldn’t push you away.”

“ _ Get out of my head _ .” 

She didn’t want May to see just how broken she was. Daisy launched herself at Melinda, receiving a swift kick to the gut for her troubles. She felt herself getting dragged down into the memory, and tried to fight it.

She cussed as she felt the darkness seeping into her vision. “I don’t- want you- to see-”

_ Once he was gone, so was she. _

_ A darkness started creeping up even before he died; curling around her vision, pushing at her thoughts, telling her, “Soon you’ll be alone. Just like you were before. Just like you always will be.” _

_ It hurt. Obviously, it hurt, but this was something new, something more twisted. _

_ She’d lost before. She’d been stabbed, shot, and beaten before. But the pain had never been anything like this. A knife was digging into her lungs, and she wanted to scream, but she couldn’t because it was too late. Because she was just too late. _

_ And he was gone. _

_ She didn’t notice that the Zephyr had arrived until Simmons tried to fix her injuries and she quaked the scientist into the wall, screaming. She’d stumbled to her room where she locked the door. Nobody tried to talk to her that night, attempting to give her space. _

_ Nobody noticed when she sliced the palm of her hand on her broken mirror. _

_ Nobody noticed when she repeated Lincoln’s name. _

_ Nobody noticed whenever she left, early in the morning when the sun hadn’t yet risen and the cold, sharp world seemed like shards of broken glass improperly aligned. _

_ Good. They didn’t need her pain dragging them all down. _

_ She was sparing them. _

“Sparing us?”

“Shut  _ up _ .”

And again they went, plunged into another memory.

_ Skye got up choppily from the cobblestone floor after the blast, her limbs not working together properly. After the explosion, her ears had begun ringing so loud everything was whining at her. Vaguely, she saw a SHIELD quinjet leave above her as her mom, Jiaying, staggered up beside her, her hand on her gunshot wound from Gonzales. Skye forgot about everything and focused on Jiaying, helping her with Lincoln up next to her. _

_ She was so grateful Jiaying hadn’t been hurt that she’d barely registered what she said: “How could you let them do this to us? I thought you were on our side!” Her mother pleaded with her, leaning on Lincoln for support, her eyes steely and accusing. _

_ She stares at her, confused.  _ Them?

_ Oh. _

Oh.

_ “I- I am, I promise! I had no idea, I swear!” _

_ Jiaying hit her with one more devastated look as Lincoln led her away, out of the gates of Afterlife. Skye stared after them, dumbfounded. Her thoughts were disrupted by a young agent coming behind her with an Icer.  _

_ I’ll show you what happens when you bomb innocent people like that, she thought darkly. You have no idea what I can do. The man watched in horror as his gun was quaked to pieces in front of his eyes. He dropped it, depending on hand to hand combat instead. _

_ He should’ve just run. Skye looks down at his battered body only seconds later before hearing.  _

_ “Skye, stop!” _

_ She looked up from his body to see May, running towards her alone. May was with SHIELD. SHIELD bombed her home, her safe haven. And May had been right there as it happened. “What have you done?” Daisy growls. _

_ “That’s what we’re trying to figure out, but you need to stand down.” _

_ Stand down? She hadn’t done anything! SHIELD attacked them! _

_ “Stand down?! After Gonzales just shot my mom and declared war on us? You need to stand down!” Skye retorted. _

_ “Where’s Gonzales? I need to find him. We can fix this!” _

_ “It’s too late for that. Now take your men and get the hell out of here.” She didn’t say it, but the underlying threat of ‘or else’ was there. They needed to leave. This place was a home for so many people, but not them. _

_ May glared at her. “Not until I see Gonzales.” She made a move to shoulder past Skye but the younger woman grabbed May’s wrist, stopping her. They both made eye contact, each seeing the fight that was going to happen. _

_ Skye struck first, with two punches and a swing at May’s face, but she easily blocked all three attempts. May ducked out of the way of the fourth and shoved Skye away. On the fifth, May swung her punching arm around her own neck and grabbed both wrists, capturing Skye in a headlock. _

_ “I don’t want to hurt you!” She yelled, and Skye knew that though they had been on the same team, this was it. May was part of an organization that declared war on her people. She was just as guilty as Gonzales. _

_ “You won’t!” Skye grunted and thrust May off of her with her foot, catching her arm and socking her on the jaw, causing a split lip. May readied herself to fight again, and they pushed back into their dangerous game of trying to incapacitate the other as quickly as possible, with Skye more viscous than May. May took a few kicks to the chest before jumpkicking Skye so that she stumbled backwards, then swept her legs out from underneath her. _

_ “Stop wasting time, Skye! We can fix this!” May told her as Skye rose up to her feet. _

_ “You’re not welcome here,” she snarled, and quaked May as hard as she could, sending her tumbling, knocking her out. _

_ And Skye hadn’t cried then, because her mother was watching. But yet her mother figure? The real one that helped her recover from missions? That made her green tea every time she couldn’t sleep? She lay at a heap at her feet, hurt from  _ her _ powers. _

_ It just felt wrong. _

_ So she wept on the inside, for the crack in their relationship she didn't think would ever heal. _

When they surfaced from this memory, Daisy didn’t give May a chance to respond before rolling to the floor and catapulting herself into the next major traumatizing event in her life.

_ Her skin was crawling, the cocoon encasing her limbs first and working its way up her torso. _

_ No. No! This was not supposed to happen, she thought in panic. “Tri… Trip!” She called, reaching out for her friend as she was enveloped completely. _

_ Everything was pitch black. She was trapped, unable to move. _

_ Suddenly, she could feel her fingers again as the husk began to crumble. How long she had stayed in the cocoon, she didn’t know, it could’ve been seconds or it could’ve been years for all she knew.  _

_ Now the husk was falling away from her face, her sight beginning to come back to her. _

_ But what she saw… God, what she saw was Trip, seemingly turned to stone on the ground beside her.  _

_ She felt the earthquake begin, but couldn’t tell where it had come from. Skye glanced around the room looking to see if Raina had survived, but she wasn’t in sight. _

_ Skye looked to Trip once more and watched as he crumbled to pieces, knowing this was her fault. _

Daisy was on the floor when she came back to reality. May was crouched next to her, her eyes closed as an expression of pure sorrow ran across her face before she furrowed her brows and reverted back to her impassive stony facade.

“It wasn’t your fault,” May whispered, searching Daisy’s pale face. Daisy pushed herself up from the floor with clammy fingers, ignoring the hand May extended to her. “It sure felt like it,” she snarled, feeling, above all else, pissed off. Whatever dirt drink she’d taken from Jiaying was throwing her into her worst, most painful memories, and it was fucking with her. Not to mention that all of these feelings were being laid bare in front of May. This wasn’t helping her find her powers, it was just showing May how weak and broken and useless she truly was. The lies she’d been telling everyone for the past year-  _ I’m fine, that was nothing, I’ve been through worse _ \- were slowly unraveling, practically against her will.

She avoided May’s eyes and hissed when she elbowed a cabinet. She couldn’t let May think she was weak. She needed to show her she was worth it, worth…

She lunged at May, but this time barely got a punch in before hurtling into her past once more.

_ Skye walked quietly across the black-and-white checkered floor, using the moonlight filtering through the dirty stained glass to see ahead of her in the dark hallway. Using tactics she’d learned long ago, now experienced from hundreds of nights sneaking across the linoleum floor. _

_ “Skye!” She heard behind her, her name called out in a hushed whisper. She whirled around, already knowing who it was, since only one nun in the orphanage was kind enough to call her by her chosen name. _

_ “Sister Margaret,” Skye answered, with the decency to look down at her hole-ridden sock clad feet. Her long, unbrushed hair swept to cover her eyes.“I was just-” _

_ “Now, Skye. I’ve been witness to enough of your late night trips to the lake to not need an excuse,” the Sister said, her kind whisper enough to bring Skye’s head up to meet her eyes. _

_ “Sorry, sister,” she apologized.  _

_ “Let’s go, Skye,” Sister Margaret responded, walking up to the twelve-year-old and placing a comforting hand at her back. “Down to the dock.” _

_ Skye smiled at her gratefully and followed her out the front doors of the bleak, dilapidated group home and down to the shore of the lake mere yards away. _

_ Skye wrapped her t-shirt in her hands and let herself down onto the edge of the wooden dock, her skinny, stunted frame needing a little help from the Sister to sit. _

_ “What happened this time, Skye?”  _

_ Skye could hear the unspoken question behind her words: Why did this family return you? What did you do wrong this time? _

_ “I was useless,” Skye answered bitterly, looking out at the water with a frown.  _

_ “Skye…” Margaret began to chide, but Skye shook her head. “No. It’s true. They bought me because it would make them look good; the perfect parents that took in some poor, lonely orphan. They returned me because the public didn’t like me anymore.” _

_ She was quiet, until she added, “I’ve figured it out… how to stay in a family.” _

_ “Yes?” _

_ “I have to be useful. That’s how I stay.” _

_ “No, Skye, you can’t think that way-” _

_ “But it’s true. That’s the only way anybody will ever love me, if I’m useful to them. So I gotta figure out how to make myself worth it.” She climbed up to her feet and left before Sister Margaret could tell the girl that she loved Skye, and that she would always, always be worth it. _

_ Two weeks later, Sister Margaret disappeared, and little Skye never found out why. _

“Fuck,” Daisy was thrown out of the memory with a headache and ringing ears, stumbling. 

She didn’t give herself a chance to look at May as she heard, “You don’t need to be useful to be loved…”

“I  _ really  _ don’t feel like having this talk right now,” she snarled.

This time, when they were thrust into the memory, Daisy already knew what to expect.

_ Mary Sue stood on her tiptoes, reaching as far as she could into the cabinet. She almost had the glass in her grasp… _

_ She jumped, hoping the extra inches she gained by doing so would let her grab the glass from the shelf. Mary Sue didn’t want to ask her new foster mom for help. The dad was nice, but he was at work, and the mom was mean to her when the dad wasn’t home. She could grab the glass by herself. _

_ On the third jump, she finally managed to grab the glass. Ah ha! Success! See? She was right. She didn’t need help anymore. _

_ As her feet landed though, her knuckles brushed the edge of the cabinet, sending the cup tumbling to the floor. _

_ It shattered on impact, shards covering the laminate.  _

_ Mary Sue looked up to see her foster mom in the doorway, and she knew instantly she was in trouble. _

_ “I’m sorry,” she said, shrinking back against the counter as the foster mom rushed toward her. Mary Sue had learned long ago to make herself as small a target as possible when the adults got angry. “It was an accident,” she added in a frightened whisper. _

_ “You’re sorry? You bet you’re sorry.” The woman’s firm hand wrapped around her wrist so tightly, Mary Sue couldn’t stop the small yelp of pain that escaped her. _

_ Mary Sue was so terrified she couldn’t think straight. “I…” she stammered. “I didn’t mean to,” she managed as she was being dragged through the kitchen, the iron grip on her arm leaving her no choice but to follow. _

_ They were in the hallway now and Mary Sue knew they were headed to the small bedroom she slept in. “You’re hurting me!” she cried, trying to pry her arm free, but the grip only tightened. _

_ Her foster mother flung Mary Sue through the doorway and slammed the door shut, leaving the small child alone in the dark once again. _

Daisy blinked rapidly trying to clear this memory from her brain, the feeling of being so small and unable to protect herself lingering. It was neither the first nor last time a foster parent had left bruises on her skin.

“How old were you?” May asked with a shake of her head, clearing Daisy’s fear and helplessness from herself.

“I dunno. Ten? Eleven?” Daisy rolled her shoulders trying to loosen up before they went another round. She hated feeling like a child again, and this exercise was exposing all of her flaws, her weaknesses. 

May’s expression darkened. “That’s no way to treat a child.”

She didn’t need May’s pity. “I grew up that way, May. I learned to rely on myself.”

May stepped closer. “Just because you had to grow up that way, doesn’t mean you don’t have people you can rely on now.”

“I know…” Daisy grumbled in her frustration.

“Do you?” May questioned before throwing an unexpected punch at Daisy.

Daisy dodged at the last second, spinning behind May, and landing a swift kick to the back of May’s leg. The older woman stumbled briefly, but came back at Daisy quickly.

She flung up her arm, to block May’s fist from colliding with her jaw, but the second they made contact, Daisy was once again in her past.

_ “Mary Sue!” She heard her foster mom calling from across the yard, but she kept playing in the sandbox. She didn’t want to go back inside yet.  _

_ “MARY SUE! It’s dinner time!” It was louder this time. _

_ She put the finishing touches on her sand castle, sticking a leaf into the tallest tower to be the flag of rebellion.  _

_ “Coming!” she screamed as she took off running toward the door.  _

_ When she went inside, she saw her foster brother, Jacob, already at the dinner table. Mary Sue liked him. He was almost her age and they played together a lot. She was jealous of him a lot though. This was his real family and she was just a foster kid. _

_ “Mary Sue, come sit with me!” he said upon seeing her walk in. _

_ She grinned and did as she was asked.  _

_ Jeanie, the foster mom, came over carrying a plate of food for each of them. “Did you both wash your hands?” Oh, no. She sounded unhappy with them. Sometimes if Jeanie drank her grown-up drinks, she wasn’t very nice. _

_ “Sorry, Mommy, I forgot!” Jacob said as he jumped up to go wash his hands.  _

_ “That’s ok, baby,” Jeanie said a little more kindly before turning to Mary Sue with her eyebrows raised. She looked mad again. _

_ “I forgot, too…” she was nervous, but it worked for Jacob, so she added, “Mommy,” very quietly. _

_ Jeanie slammed the plates down on the table. “What did you call me?” she asked angrily. _

_ Mary Sue shrank back into her chair, worried she said something wrong. _

_ “What did you call me?” Jeanie asked again. _

_ “Mommy?” Mary Sue answered uncertainly. _

_ She didn’t see Jeanie’s hand coming, and suddenly she found herself falling out of her chair and on to the floor, her cheek burning. Jeanie had hit her. _

_ “I’m sorry!” Mary Sue wailed from the dining room floor, tears streaming down her face.  _

_ Jeanie was standing over her, pointing a finger in her face. “I’m not your mother. You don’t have a family and you’re only here so I can get my extra check from the government!” _

Daisy’s eyes were burning as the memory faded. She sat dejectedly on the bed, dropping her head in her hands. She couldn’t keep reliving these memories.

After a moment, the bed sagged next to her as May sat down, putting a comforting hand on Daisy’s back. 

“We need to talk.”

“Yeah, we do,” Daisy sighed, spent.

**Author's Note:**

> This story is part of the [LLF Comment Project](https://longlivefeedback.tumblr.com/llfcommentproject), which was created to improve communication between readers and authors. This author invites and appreciates feedback, including:
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